In Which Harry Gets Around
by MinionsOfTheNachoArmyUnite
Summary: Harry discovers he is part veela. Upside- he has a mate. Downside- he doesn't know who the mate is, so he has to find out the 'hard way.' Wait, or was it the other way around? AU. Most likely eventual Slash. WIP.
1. Prologue: In Which A Discovery is Made

**A/N:** Hi.

So, this is my first new story in _quite_ a while. It will be multi-chaptered, I'm just not exactly sure how long. Chapters will be short. Stupid little idea I got for a parody story. Wonderfully un-beta'd, so any errors are mine. Yeah, I think that's pretty much it.

**Title: **In Which Harry Gets Around

**Summary:** Harry discovers he is part veela. Pro- he has a mate. Con- he doesn't know who the mate is, so he has to find out the 'hard way.' Or was it the other way around? AU. Possible Slash. WIP.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Harry Potter, and if this is any indication, if it ever got into my hands, that would be a _very bad thing._

* * *

Harry stared incredulously at his Headmaster, Albus Dumbledore, with a look of utter shock on his face. "_What?_"

"You're part Veela, Harry. I know for a fact that you know what they are. In fact, you are actually related to Fleur." He answered with the usual twinkle in his eye.

"I understand that part. It's the… other part… that I'm a bit confused on." How did he never find out about this before? Surely Dumbledore had told someone else, that was the logical thing to do. However, as it seemed like the whole of the Wizarding World suffered logicphobia, so this blatant disregard really should be all that surprising.

"You mean you having a mate?"

"Exactly. What does that mean? What do I have to do?"

"It means you must find the person you are meant to spent your life with and… consummate the relationship."

"You mean you find the person I'm meant to be with and then I get to sleep with them? Awesome." Harry said as he leaned back in his chair. This was sounding much better than it originally had. All he had to do was sit back and wait for someone to bring him a (hopefully ridiculously hot) girl that he got to have sex with. Maybe if he was lucky, they would even-

"Not quite, I'm afraid." Dumbledore interrupted his thoughts. "We can't actually be sure who your mate is _until _you've 'slept with them,' as you so delicately put it. Also, it's someone you already know, because if you didn't you'd already be dead by now."

"Oh. Well, that's still pretty good. I have a lot of hot female friends. I mean… err…" Harry said before he could stop himself.

Dumbledore gave him a semi-stern look before saying, "What about your male friends?"

"What about them?" He asked before his eyes widened in shock. "Oh, you mean-"

"Yes. Or, who's to say the person isn't friendly with you? Or a different age? Or perhaps even already married?" Dumbledore asked nonchalantly.

Harry gulped. "So, it really could be _anyone _I know? Even those related to me?" Dumbledore nodded. "And how long do I have?"

"Two months."

"You're saying I have to sleep with every person I've ever met in two months, or I will die?"

"Yes."

"OK, then. I guess I'll start on that tomorrow." He said as he walked out of his Headmaster's office, whose eyes were now twinklier then ever. Manipulative bastard.

* * *

**A/N: **So, did you like it?

I'll continue it eventually (hopefully within the next few days), promise.

Review, please?

Thanks for reading, despite it's obvious stupidity!


	2. In Which Luna is Unquestioning

**A/N: **Hi.

Sorry, I was having a bit of trouble with this. This is a short update, hopefully later the chapters will get only notes on this chapter is 'Go randomness and Luna (And potpourri).'

Thanks to all who reviewed!

**Disclaimer:** Nerp.

* * *

"Hello, Harry." Luna Lovegood said in her airy voice to The-Boy-Who-Lived-Only-To-Possibly-Die-For-The-Stupidest-Reason-Ever. She looked at him thoughtfully for a moment before saying, "You seem troubled."

Harry laughed humorlessly, not at her, but at his dismaying predicament. How was he going to find his mate this way? How many women did he know? How many _people _did he know? He shuddered at the thought. Like any normal 16-year-old, he didn't mind the idea of having to sleep with people. It was the sheer number that made him want to crawl into a hole, be buried alive, have a nuclear bomb dropped on him, only to be dug up hundreds of years later by an interplanetary species and/or some random Muggles who never heard the words 'Harry' and 'Potter' uttered together in the same sentence. Unless, of course, the sentence was something like 'Harry had to go to the professional potter to have a special bowl made for his wife.'

After brooding over what kind of bowl Harry would ask the potter to make for a bit (He decided on one in which someone could put potpourri.), he responded to Luna's statement with a vague, "I have a problem."

"Really?" She asked, looking only vaguely concerned. That was explained when she added, "Well, that's hardly anything new."

Harry smirked, despite his current situation. "True."

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

Harry looked at her with an incredulous look before saying, "Well, there is _one _thing…"

* * *

"Can I go now?" Luna said, not rudely, as she stepped out of the conjured bed in the Room of Requirement.

"As you wish." Harry asked, using that always-popular-when-looking-at-Luna Look. Only she would never even question as to why he had to-

"See you later then. Oh, and Harry?" She said. Harry had to hold his breath, as he had to remember to not look a gift horse in the mouth, and not everyone (or no one else at all) would be this indifferent. "I do hope I was able to help." She finished, and scampered out of the room without so much as a backward glance.

Harry let out a slight laugh. That was Luna- there when you needed her, but always in the strangest of ways.

* * *

**A/N:** So? Anything? I know that it's probably not as great as the intro, but I quite liked it.

Review?

Thanks for reading.


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